Yes, You Can…Live the Life of Your Dreams!

 It’s spring cleaning time! The arrival of spring has historically meant that we spend some time and elbow grease (anyone old enough to know that phrase?) cleaning out closets and drawers, getting rid of items we no longer use. Almost every day since the first day of spring I’ve seen an article in the newspaper or magazines giving tips for getting rid of clutter. How many of us spend even a fraction of that time (assuming we actually get around to spring cleaning our homes!) cleaning our minds of useless clutter? Saint Paul admonished us to “…be transformed by the renewal of our minds…”. Philosopher Ernest Holmes said “…change your thinking, change your life.”

     Renewing our minds and changing our thinking both require spring cleaning our minds. We spring clean our minds in much the same way we clean our homes…by identifying and getting rid of useless clutter. Both take some time, but both are well worth the time. You probably know how to identify and get rid of useless clutter in your home, but do you know how to get rid of the clutter in your mind? We all, experts say, think about 60,000 thoughts a day, and most of those are redundant…that is, most are the same tired thoughts we had yesterday, and the day before, and on and on. It’s a habit we can’t seem to break. But…regardless of what we think, we can change our habits, we can think new thoughts!

     To change a habit, begin in much the same way you begin spring cleaning. Identify the thoughts you want to change. This is the hardest part because it requires you to sit long enough to know (identify) the thoughts you want to change.

     Tips for Spring Cleaning Your Mind

1.  Find a quiet place, and a time when you’ll have no interruptions. Have pen and paper handy. Get still.

2.  Ask yourself these questions: What needs cleaning out? What’s keeping me stuck? What do I really believe about myself? Do I really believe this, or is it a hangover from past relationships? Do I want to hang onto these beliefs or am I ready to let them go and replace them with new beliefs that are in alignment with who I am now?

3.  What negative self-talk do I have? Or any kind of negative thoughts?

4.  What prejudices do I have…about myself or others?

5.  Check your emotions and feelings about your beliefs. How do you feel? How does your body feel?

6.  Once you have an idea of what’s in the closet of your mind, ask…How is this serving me? Are my beliefs, self-talk, negative thoughts and prejudices holding me back?

7.  When you’ve asked the questions and know what needs cleaning out, picture yourself putting all these old beliefs and negativity into a box and setting it on the curb, ready to be carried away by waste management. Or you could do as I do occasionally…have a burning ceremony, literally or figuratively…write it all on a piece of paper (which you’ve already done!) and burn it! I use flash paper because it leaves no ash…there is nothing left behind of my self-limiting thoughts and beliefs! You can get flash paper on the Internet.

Next time…how to create new beliefs. ‘Til then…happy thoughts!


Yes, You Can…Have the Life of Your Dreams!

Emily was a beautiful young woman who thought she wanted to be an actress.  She did everything her agent told her she needed to do, which included spending her inheritance to keep herself in makeup and clothes.  And still she couldn’t “get a break.”  The harder she tried, the more she spent, the worse things were.

     Then one day something changed.  She went on a “cattle call” – a bus ride to a movie location in hope of being picked as an extra.

     On the bus she met a woman who explained the rules to Emily, who had never experienced an extras call.  Her MOD had always been to wait for her agent to call with an audition.  but working as an extra promised quick money, which Emily needed because her car had just broken down.

     At the location, the glamor of “show biz” disappeared.  People in hope of being extras had to wait in long lines, without the perks of regulars.  They quickly became hot, tired and thirsty, but to get out of line to grab a bottle of water might mean losing a chance.  Emily, however desperate she might need money, didn’t play by the rules.  She left the line in search of water or coffee, even food.  Through the course of the day, Emily talked herself into getting roles she never dreamt about.  And in doing so, she began to realize what she really wanted…which was the approval of people she loved, approval she never felt she had.  She also got clear that being an actress wasn’t want she wanted.

     As Emily began to get clear about what she really wanted to do with her life, her obsession with her looks, her clothing, needing approval, began to fade.  As her obsessions lessened, she became the confidant and sought actress she thought she wanted to be.  She began to receive more and more “lucky breaks”, even finding the man with whom she wanted to share her life.

     Funny thing about “lucky breaks”.  They really have nothing to do with luck.  They’re all a matter of vibration.  Have you ever noticed that when you feel bad, nothing seems to go right, everything seems to go wrong?  I’ve been that way.  Seems like the harder I try, when I’m in a “blue funk” everything just gets worse.  The opposite is true.  When I’m feeling happy, everything seems to go my way.  People I want to hear from call, money floats into my account as if by magic, life just feels good!  That’s what happened to Emily, the better she felt about herself, breaks came her way, people wanted to be near her, she became the person she wanted to be.  

     There isn’t a secret to lucky breaks.  It’s quantum physics 101, expect the best, that’s what you’ll receive.  Expectations, according to John Wheeler, a physicist, happen because of us.  What we expect, we’ll see.  When Emily stopped obsessing and just began doing what she loved, and began to treat herself with respect, she began to expect others to treat her the same way.  Her life just got better and better.  

     What do you want?  What do you expect?  My husband, Rod, has a motto, “Live expectantly!?”  I add to that:  “And expect the best!”  Don’t leave your life to chance.  Life isn’t a cattle call.  You don’t have to settle for being an extra.  You’re the star in your life, but you’re also the screenwriter, the director, and the producer.  You get to decide…what will it be?  Expect the best…and see it happen!